April 17th, 2012
Plateaus happen. In weight loss. Your career. And definitely relationships.
Kick your plateau mentality
All of these areas require determination and discipline to simply maintain—and even more concentrated efforts when it’s time to jazz things up.
Face it. Life hits mediocre sometimes. It just does. So often we catastrophize: ‘I’m destined to never lose weight!’ (four weeks into a new program.) ‘This isn’t the job I thought it would be. I’d better look again’ (six months into a new position.) ‘I married the wrong person’ (two years into a new union.)
What if you took the following viewpoint instead? What if you considered each plateau in life a necessary resting platform before you take the next big step? A chance to catch your breath, re-evaluate your course, and go again—this time more adventurously?
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Tags: career, perspective, plateau, relationships, transformation, weight
Posted in The Transformational Lifestyle, The Transformational Mindset | No Comments »
March 22nd, 2012
Stop letting the scale define you!
Studies show that external measures of: achievement (i.e. counting calories), success or lackthereof (i.e. your weight on a scale) and rewards (i.e. money) often don’t motivate, and, in many cases de-motivate. Yet many weight loss programs emphasize the numbers.
The same is true for health improvement programs designed to lower your cholesterol and blood glucose or boost your muscle strength—except the difference here is that most people don’t get nearly as anxious and emotionally involved as they do with weight.
The reality is the numbers are helpful in alerting you as to how well your habit changes are working, and if some tweaking is needed. So, how can you refrain from seeing the number on the scale as somehow a measure of your worth?
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Tags: behavior change, perspective, weight, weight loss
Posted in Healthy Weight, The Transformational Mindset | No Comments »
March 6th, 2012
“Failure.”
Make eating well fun again.
“Deprivation.”
“Work… drudgery… all-or-nothing.”
I was staring at an audience of anxious, arms-crossed participants of the recently kicked-off community Biggest Loser™ challenge. I had asked what their first thoughts were when I said the words “weight loss.”
These were not first-timers. They knew (I’ll amend that to thought they knew) what they were up against and still they chose to be here. Because they also knew they wanted something more for their lives.
“Energy.”
“Freedom.”
“Vitality… connection… to be a happy mom.”
Their visions of personal well-being were resonant in their vibrant simplicity–and in stark contrast to what they thought it took to get there. After I led the participants through a brief visualization in which I asked them to picture their ideal wellness or place themselves in their optimal experience of well-being, smiles of hope started to pull up their lips. Could it be possible? Is there really another way?
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Tags: action, change, coaching, healthy eating, mindful eating, vision, weight loss, wellness
Posted in Behavior Change, Healthy Weight, Making Commitments | No Comments »
February 9th, 2012
Read below about "boot camp" accountability coaching.
If left to our own devices, we humans would likely take the lazy route. Accountability is therefore quite useful in many areas of life.
Being accountable means you are answerable to another person for your declared responsibilities or commitments. Employees are accountable to their managers at performance reviews. Students are accountable to their teachers; kids to parents; spouses to each other.
Accountability is especially essential at the beginning of a habit change, such as reducing sugar intake, or for a specific project you just can’t seem to maintain on your own, such as de-cluttering your home. Your accountability partner serves to motivate, advise, and keep you persevering, so he/she is a brilliant support in helping you build your character and integrity.
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Tags: accountability, coaching, commitments, habit change, weight loss
Posted in Building Support, The Transformational Lifestyle | No Comments »
January 25th, 2012
Even more fun: Lunch Book Club!
There’s a reason why Jane Austen book clubs, Ya-Ya Sisterhoods, and every kind of Meetup you can imagine exist. We yearn for community.
And although in-person conversations are best, I wouldn’t give up my virtual Monday Morning Book Club for the world. We are four women and two men who have made it through not quite three books in a year–and 50 life-changing conversations in the same time.
Granted, my book club is comprised of fellow coaches, and we all have given permission to speak into each other’s lives with curiosity and fierce compassion. So rather than simply discuss a chapter, we usually get right to the heart of a matter and relate it to life. We may be reading chapters, but what we’re really doing is supporting each other in writing new chapters for each of our lives.
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Tags: action, book club, coaching, commitment, community, perspective, weight, wellness
Posted in Building Support, The Transformational Lifestyle | No Comments »
December 9th, 2011
Reframe your thinking to maximize enjoyment
In my previous post, I wrote about how negative thinking is often at the root of our unhealthy behaviors. Next, let’s explore how to shift to more powerful, action-generating neutral or positive thinking.
Examples:
Negative Thinking
“I had the cake, so I might as well eat the chips and cookies, too.” (all-or-nothing thinking)
“The house is a mess! He never thinks about anyone but himself.” (blame)
“My job pays well, so it doesn’t matter if I don’t like it.” (denial) Read the rest of this entry »
Tags: action, behavior change, career, healthy eating, positive thinking, relationships, transformation coaching
Posted in Behavior Change, The Transformational Mindset | 2 Comments »
December 7th, 2011
Quick! What are you thinking about this photo right now?
Most self-help books and programs—whether they’re to help you slim down, better your relationship, or discover a fulfilling career—drive you to find the solution, the 3 key steps to bliss that you’ve apparently been missing all along. After all, your problem is obvious, right?
Probably not.
What if the problem you are trying to eradicate or correct is just the outer result of a more subtle and incredibly pervasive inner issue?
Negative thinking.
It may seem too simple, but think about it. Where does your overeating start? And your last quibble with your significant other? In your head. Some glitch in your thinking that suddenly decides you may never get access to a pan of brownies again. Or if you don’t hammer this point in the argument now, your fiancé will never get it.
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Tags: behavior change, mindset, negative thinking, self-care, transformation coaching
Posted in Behavior Change, The Transformational Mindset | No Comments »
October 12th, 2011
Learn to love your reflection.
In my previous post, I talked about how Truce coaching both transforms how you think about your body as well as your body itself. Emily was an inspiring example.
Now it’s your turn to start calling a truce with your body. We’ll start with bringing awareness to how you’re currently viewing it.
Coaching Discovery:
Take a piece of paper and split it down the middle. On the left-hand side, list all the things you are frustrated by and dislike about your body. Right-hand: All the things you love about your life. List at least 10 for each. Be specific; if you say you love your job, what is it specifically that gets you up in the morning? (Pause, and do this before reading ahead. Also notice what feelings or energy is stirred up when writing each list.)
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Tags: acceptance, appreciation, body image, transformation, Truce coaching, weight
Posted in Body Image, Transformation Coaching | No Comments »
October 4th, 2011
Yes, you can feel this good about your body
I have coached clients and been in enough conversations with my own female friends to know that if we women actually spoke to passerby on the street in the same constantly disparaging ways we talk internally to ourselves (particularly about our bodies), we’d end up in some serious hand-smacking, hair-pulling, tear-inducing fights.
Those kinds of thoughts and mis-beliefs are simply not in line with the gift you are in this world. But, since you’ve likely carried this subconscious attitude for a good long time now, what do you do about it, and how can coaching help?
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Tags: action, beliefs, body image, coaching, commitment, perspective, transformation, vision, weight
Posted in Healthy Weight, Making Commitments, Transformation Coaching | No Comments »
August 30th, 2011
Turn your life on its head
Last blog, I mentioned that transformational living may mean subtracting habits or attitudes that are varnishing over your authenticity and no longer serving who you want to be.
Well, the more I coach and live my own life, the more I am convinced that transformation also calls for a 180 degree turn from what you are currently doing. You see, our egos and the assessments we make of how things “should” be get in the way so much that whatever you think is the best course of action often merits considering the complete opposite.
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Tags: 180 degrees, action, change, choice, transformation
Posted in The Transformational Lifestyle | 1 Comment »
